Rape: Meaning, Causes and Saying No beyond Words

The problems in our society are quite appalling. Different problems everyday, it is quite disheartening to wake up to this awful news daily. From rape to racism and others. What's happening to the world?

Why do we train our women to be responsible and forget to train most of our men?
We live in a society where the woman is blamed for being raped. Rape is never the victims' fault because no body wants to be raped. We tell our women to dress well to avoid rape but it is not about the dressing. Modestly dressed people get raped, babies are raped and we blame it on the dressing of the woman. We have freedom to dress in the way we like but then we become scared.


We live in a society where we let innocent women be raped, get blamed and die of depression or sometimes even get killed by the rapist while the rapists roam the street like innocent people. Most women who get raped can't even speak up because of the fear of been condemned by the society. It's true that men also get raped but the cases of male rape is very low compared to that of women.


We need to be bold and speak up. We are the change we want to see in the world.

This article is about rape, definition and it's effect. The post also highlights some rape cases around the world, causes and solutions to rape.

Do you know that apart from "Corruption", Rape has also gotten to the danger zone  as a menace in many Countries of the world.

Daily News Correspondent was privileged to meet and sample opinions of some people on the issue of rape rocking the Society.

Photo: Rape | meaning; causes, effects cases and solutions | image credit: Getty Images

What is the meaning of rape? In a simple definition, Rape means to force sexual intercourse or any other sexual activities on someone.

Causes of Rape

Some of the identified causes of Rape are:

1. High emotional Tension: The libido in most humans cannot be overemphasized, some Men/Women have high sexual urge which in most cases cannot be over controlled and at that same point passing through seduction from opposite sex. This can make him or her briefly reach a conclusion that forcing the opposite sex will make him/her satisfied.
2. Revenge: Cheat breakups (Revenge): Some guys may think setting up a lady and raping her will let her realised how hurtful he experienced when she left him for another richer Guy/Men.
3. Inability to understand the will and the word of God: According to Mr. Olayinka, he opines, saying "..all I can say about the issue you raised is that we should all pray that bad spirit shouldn't control our soul. All this crimes which people are committing are not just from their will. Some are under a spell, some is a kind of madness which can't be properly define."               

Psychologist, Dr. Ibukunnle explained Rape as "a forceful sexual intercourse without the consent of other party involved." To the Dr, he called It an Assault,  which may be caused by many factors:

The Other causes of Rape:

1. Overexposure to nudity,
2. Arrogance  on the part of Ladies,
3. Absence of home training,
4. Lack of fear of God.

Rape is a big act and crime against humanity, because victims of rapists will hardly forget it. 

According to Dr. Ibukunnle, solution to curb rape act should be "Capital Punishment/Life Imprisonment."

What are the Justice for Rape Victims?

How well and fast does a rape victim gets Justice, especially in Nigeria and some African countries. Report indicates that it takes time for rape case to get settled in Nigerian court. 

According to the Nigerian legal system on rape, the rape victim must prove to the court the penetration before been cross-examined by the Court for justice to be served. 

To prove a rape case is becoming deficult, even than the rape act. At times, it might even be difficult to pinpoint who is guilty or not due to the technicality of the case in most cases.

"Rape a behaviour that needs to be totally eradicated. This has been relating itself in this our dear Country. where our ladies are no more secured, where no capital punishment attached to it. I think Nigeria needs to wake up and let's reason together as a Country that will flourish; the lives of everybody should not be endanger due to rape," Comrade Stephen opined.

Still on the rape and the breakdown, a Pharmacist and psychologist, Dr. Emeka opined thus "Rape is just very bad, am not a good judge of character but psychological assessment is required then in court. Also, there jail term should be very long, giving capital punishment shouldn't be for everything only in cases of murder or terrorism or where raping cases is in an alarming rate."

Opnions on some common causes of rape:

Dr. Emeka said  "On random ones, some ladies are found of showing there private parts to lure some men into such act.  Yes! You are being  addressed the way your dressed.

"For you putting on Skippy, tight skirt and short trousers, what signal or message do you think it is sending?

"Aside that, some guys, do rape ladies for ritual reasons."

While highlighting the effects and aftermath of rape, he noted:

"The effects and aftermath of rape can include both physical trauma and psychological trauma.

"However, physical force is not necessarily used in rape, and physical injuries are not always a consequence. Deaths associated with rape are known to occur, though the prevalence of fatalities varies considerably across the world."

"For  rape victims, the more common consequences of sexual violence are those related to reproductive health, mental health, and social wellbeing."

These are the effects of  Rape in the Society:

1. Physical  impact: This comes with deformation of the victim and the bad feelings.
2. Gynecologic: Gynecology has to do with the study of Medical Problems of Women, especially the reproductive system, it's another branch of Medicine. Hence, the common Gynecologic consequences experienced by rape survivors include- Vaginal or anal bleeding, infection and Hypoactive sexual desire disorder
3. Vaginitis or vaginal inflammation.
4. Dyspareunia: It means painful sexual intercourse. 
5. Vaginismus: This means a condition affecting a woman's ability to engage in any form of vaginal penetration.
6. Chronic pelvic pain: Victim of rape could experience pains in the bones all over their Body, which could cause discomfort.
7. Urinary tract infections: Through rape, the victim is opened to infectious diseases in the (Penis) for Male and (Virgina) for female. This urinary tract infection makes the victim feel pains while urinating.
8. Pregnancy: This is the most known one, the victim, especially with unprotected sex is 99% exposed to getting pregnant.
9. HIV/AIDS: Acronym for human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) and Acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS), the virus comes through contact with blood, especially from intercourse. Hence, rape victims are prone to this virus and the Virus drains blood and weaken the cells in the body; leaving the victim to different diseases and untimely death.

These are the solutions to Rape:

1. Sex Education: In a quest to profer solutions, Parents are advised to engage in "sex education" to their children. ladies should be modest in their dressings and guys should be more careful.
2. Prayer: Dr. Emeka added that "We should be more prayerful because Rape is a spirit. This Country needs to be baptized;  people are just too " desperate.
3. Awareness and publicity from Government, NGOs and Civil Society Organizations: It is believed that if Government, Parents, NGOs and Individual should focus attention more on curbing rape, by increasing the awareness and dangers in rape, the story could change to reduce the menace of rape around the world.

Rape: Of the Victim and the Accused

 

Rape victims and survivors suffer great trauma what with all the commotion raised by internet users who took to various social media platforms to pour out their grievances after the release of Busola Dakolo's interview. A lot of people had a lot of things to say about the issues raised in the video and there were back and forth arguments about who to believe and who was lying. My thoughts? Well read on.

It takes a lot of strength, especially mental, for a person to come out and say he or she was raped and when such persons do come out let us, mere outsiders, not be too quick to judge and cast blames. Rape is a very painful experience, one that cannot be quickly forgotten, if at all it is gotten over. It does a lot to a person's self-esteem that most victims turn out to be desperate people who search for self-validation everywhere even at places where it is obvious that it cannot be found. I implore us all to show more attention and compassion to people that will come to us to report any sort of sexual violations they suffer.

There is a lot of pretense in the society today. A lot of people only get involved in conflicts when a well-known persona is a party but when the victim is an unknown person it becomes no one's business. Taking reference in Busola's case, her story became this popular only because she is a public figure. We should do our part and not turn deaf ears when the story is that of Nkechi, an helpless sixteen year old student that live in a local town. Let us please stop with the hypocrisy.

The shame culture that is practiced by Nigerians is a sad one indeed. It makes it so that victims of rape are ashamed and afraid to come out and tell their stories. They get to deal with the trauma that comes with the experience and also have to face the stigmatization that coming out will attract with it. Nobody ever wishes to be raped and it is entirely unfair to even suggest that the victim is to be blamed; the victim is never the cause. It is, therefore, our collective responsibility to create a society that respects rape victims as the survivors they truly are and to hold them at a high pedestal that is the complete opposite of the ridicule they would otherwise be put through.

Read: Biography of Actress Kehinde Bankole

Now there are a lot of rape apologists out there justifying rape and giving stupid reasons and excuses such as, 'It's not rape when she was dressed provocatively', 'His no usually means yes', 'They deserved it'. Let me set this straight, sex without consent is rape. Sex with another person without the person's permission is rape and there is no such thing as silent approval. If you want to save yourself from being labelled as a rapist do not have sex with someone that is showing any sign of reluctance but instead go on to some other person that shares mutual interest with you. Trust me, there are many people out there that will meet your taste.

Another thing to discuss is rapists themselves. Do not be the unfortunate being that will forcefully take what is not freely given to you. Always consciously and deliberately try not to be in a situation where you'd have to sexually assault somebody, it is an advice I will always give to people that know they are weak in that respect. If you're someone that struggles with issues that make you do things you would rather not do then save someone the heartache and seek help, professional or not.

Furthermore, it will be a great crime to falsely accuse someone of rape when there was a consent before the action. A lot of people have chosen this period to bounce their pain on their preys. The false accusation is as costly as the rape offence itself. Because, this will not only tarnish the integrity and image of such person that has been wrongly accused, as the label will remain as a skin on such person, if not forever, but always.
 

As I conclude, my heart goes out to every person out there who has had to experience such hateful, depressing and painful ordeal, what happened is not your fault, you're stronger than you think and you're worthy of more. Love.

Interview: Alarming Rate of Rape In The Society

Rape In The Society

Do you know that apart from "Corruption", Rape has also gotten to the danger zone  as a menace in many Countries of the world!

Daily News Correspondent was privileged to meet and sample opinions of some people on the issue of rape rocking the Society.

What is rape?

In a simple definition, Rape means to force sexual intercourse or any other sexual activities on someone.

Causes of Rape

Some of the Identified causes of Rape include, but not limited to:

1. High emotional Tension

The libido in most humans cannot be overemphasized, some Men/Women have high sexual urge which in most cases cannot be over controlled and at that same point passing through seduction from opposite sex. This can make him or her briefly reach a conclusion that forcing the opposite sex will make him/her satisfied.

2. Revenge

Cheat breakups (Revenge): Some guys may think setting up a lady and raping her will let her realised how hurtful he experienced when she left him for another richer Guy/Men

3. Inability to understand the will and the word of God.

According to Mr. Olayinka, he opines, saying "..all I can say about the issue you raised is that we should all pray that bad spirit shouldn't control our soul. All this crimes which people are committing are not just from their will. Some are under a spell, some is a kind of madness which can't be properly define."               

A Psychologist, Dr. Ibukunnle explained Rape as "a forceful sexual intercourse without the consent of other party involved." To the Dr, he called It an Assault,  which may be caused by many factors:

The Other causes of Rape:

i. Overexposure to nudity,

ii. Arrogance  on the part of Ladies,

III.  Absence of home training,

iv.  Lack of fear of God.

Read Also: Debt Alert: Nigeria Ranks 4th In World Bank Debtor's List

Rape is a big act and crime against humanity, because victims of rapists will hardly forget it. 

According to Dr. Ibukunnle, solution to curb rape act should be "Capital Punishment/Life Imprisonment."

What are the Justice for Rape Victims:

How well and fast does a rape victim gets Justice, especially in Nigeria and some African countries. Report indicates that it takes time for rape case to get settled in Nigerian court. 

According to the Nigerian legal system on rape, the rape victim must prove to the court the penetration before been cross-examined by the Court for justice to be served. 

To prove a rape case is becoming deficult, even than the rape act. At times, it might even be difficult to pinpoint who is guilty or not due to the technicality of the case in most cases.

"Rape a behaviour that needs to be totally eradicated. This has been relating itself in this our dear Country. where our ladies are no more secured, where no capital punishment attached to it. I think Nigeria needs to wake up and let's reason together as a Country that will flourish; the lives of everybody should not be endanger due to rape," Comrade Stephen opined.

Still on the rape and the breakdown, a Pharmacist and psychologist, Dr. Emeka opined thus "Rape is just very bad, am not a good judge of character but psychological assessment is required then in court. Also, there jail term should be very long, giving capital punishment shouldn't be for everything only in cases of murder or terrorism or where raping cases is in an alarming rate."

Opnions on some common causes of rape, Dr. Emeka said  "On random ones, some ladies are found of showing there private parts to lure some men into such act.  Yes! You are being  addressed the way your dressed.

"For you putting on Skippy, tight skirt and short trousers, what signal or message do you think it is sending?

"Aside that, some guys, do rape ladies for ritual reasons."

While highlighting the effects and aftermath of rape, he noted:

"The effects and aftermath of rape can include both physical trauma and psychological trauma.

"However, physical force is not necessarily used in rape, and physical injuries are not always a consequence. Deaths associated with rape are known to occur, though the prevalence of fatalities varies considerably across the world."

"For  rape victims, the more common consequences of sexual violence are those related to reproductive health, mental health, and social wellbeing."

The Effect of Rape in the Society

1. Physical  impact: This comes with deformation of the victim and the bad feelings.

2. Gynecologic: Gynecology has to do with the study of Medical Problems of Women, especially the reproductive system, it's another branch of Medicine. Hence, the common Gynecologic consequences experienced by rape survivors include- Vaginal or anal bleeding, infection and Hypoactive sexual desire disorder

3. Vaginitis or vaginal inflammation

4. Dyspareunia: It means painful sexual intercourse. 

5. Vaginismus: This means a condition affecting a woman's ability to engage in any form of vaginal penetration.

6. Chronic pelvic pain: Victim of rape could experience pains in the bones all over their Body, which could cause discomfort.

7. Urinary tract infections: Through rape, the victim is opened to infectious diseases in the (Penis) for Male and (Virgina) for female. This urinary tract infection makes the victim feel pains while urinating.

8. Pregnancy: This is the most known one, the victim, especially with unprotected sex is 99% exposed to getting pregnant.

9. HIV/AIDS: Acronym for human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) and Acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS), the virus comes through contact with blood, especially from intercourse. Hence, rape victims are prone to this virus and the Virus drains blood and weaken the cells in the body; leaving the victim to different diseases and untimely death.

The Solutions to Rape:

1. Sex Education: 

 

In a quest to profer solutions, Parents are advised to engage in "sex education" to their children. ladies should be modest in their dressings and guys should be more careful.

2.  Prayer:

Dr. Emeka added that "We should be more prayerful because Rape is a spirit. This Country needs to be baptized;  people are just too " desperate.

3. Awareness and publicity from Government, NGOs and Civil Society Organizations:

It is believed that if Government, Parents, NGOs and Individual should focus attention more on curbing rape, by increasing the awareness and dangers in rape, the story could change to reduce the menace of rape around the world. 

Interview: How I Almost Lost My Virginity

Who is a virgin|What is Rape

A Virgin is a person who has never had se@ual intercour@e, or sometimes, one who has never engaged in any se@ual activity at all. Reports and happenings so far showed that in coming years, having a Virgin as wife may be rear. 

Decade of years back, Virgins are treated like queens by their husbands and Families because Virginity is considered as pride of every lady in Africa. Daily News Report finds out if it is still a pride up till today.

Most Females lost their Virginity during teenage, many reasons are attached to this. In our interview with Miss Agboola Bukola, a lady from Ibadan City who said her image should not be fully revealed, we find out her view on Virginity and issues surrounding it.

According to Miss Bukola, she said Virginity is a pride, not only for married Women, but the pride starts from Adulthood. "Virginity is a thing of pride for every lady, not only Woman. Specifically, those ladies that care to protect their Virginity," She said.

While responding to her view on virgin among Females nowadays. She said Virginity is not only rear among Ladies, but from Guys as well. "Why is it that only female should be a virgin, our men too engage in sexual activities, but because they are men, no one and nothing could tell if they are virgins or not. 

"Yes, I can say categorically that virginity is rear among us these days because of many factors. To mention some: Peer group influence - Where a lady gets influenced and advised by co-peers to do what they are doing. It's just like a Friend smoking, the other friend will one-day wish to smoke.

"Secondly: Easy access to pronography clips and Images. This is one of the issues civilization and jet age has brought to us. Everyone now has access to the internet, even babies start watching pronography from their parents. Take for instance, a situation where the husband, wife and their children stay in one single room, there is no way the kids won't spy on their parents. 

"Let me also add that Ladies nowadays are having more high urge for sex. Hardly can one stay on the internet or in a Community without hearing one sexual act and the other. All these transmit to our brain and we will one-day think of practicing them,"  She explained.

Daily News Report asked if our Guest is still a Virgin. She boldly confirmed to us. According to her, she said she almost lost her Virginity when she was small. 

"I'm proud to say I'm still a virgin. Very shocking, some people will not believe because of the way I look. Though, I didn't say I'm very pretty, but once people eyes pretty lady, they instantly run their value statement on her, concluding she is a whore. 

"While I was small, myself and my other friends used to do one play called "Daddy and Mummy". Very funny and stupid play where we all ack like husband, wife and children. So, there was this particular day during one of the plays, I was acting like a Mother to a boy; though not really that a boy because he is older than me. After I was done with the stupid cooking where we mixed different stuffs together and call it food; the next scene was for us to sleep together.

"The boy was half-n@ked  behind me, all of a sudden, I felt something touching me. You know now, as children, we all counted it as play. Before I could realize, just as the boy struggles to penetr@te into me, he was fully n@ked already and immediately I looked back, I saw what I ought not to see and I quickly ran out of the enclosed area we made the room. He hasn't done anything stupid yet on me before I realized and ran out," She explained.

Daily News Report asked how she got to her senses. She said her Mother do engage her in S@x-Education and she was made to realize having s@x out of wedlock is a big sin to God. 

"My mom engaged me in all the lessons I need to know, after I told her what happened, she warned me to stay away from them. If I had been watching pronogr@phy and other s@xual activities then, I may be tempted to do it on that day," She said.

Miss Bukola however appealed to all women and mothers to engage their children in sex Education before they become adult. She said "...due to advancement in technology, Children can learn anywhere and any time and learning is by what your hear and see. So, our Mothers should not wait for the Child to be grown up before engaging them in s@x-Education, it is very helpful." 

Miss Bukola also appealed to Government and relevant Authorises, most especially Religious and Educational Institutions to also join in the crusade to Educate the Girl-child and Males more decently so as to bring sanity to the society.

"Not only the Females should be enlightened, the Males too should be carried along. Government and the Judiciary should also treat rape cases with utmost importance so as to teach those still planning on such act a lesson. The society can be purified again." She added.